“Dad, what happened to my underwear? I don’t have any underwear on.”
Said WWII aficionado, Doodles, with cords around his ankles, post pee, stumbling into the hallway.
He dressed himself, almost completely, this morning. When I offered him some undies to put on, he said he wanted to go without them. I suggested that going Commando may not be good for the chafing on the penis. He is currently wearing underwear again.
Mustache Robots 
You just got Father of the Year.